BLOOD & OIL Bad Combination

Article originally published as BLOOD & OIL Review on Seat42F.

It should not surprise you to learn that ABC’s BLOOD & OIL is a prime-time soap. After all, the alphabet network relies on the genre just as heavily as CBS does on crime procedurals. It’s sort of their hallmark. But there are good prime-time soaps (Grey’s Anatomy) and bad prime-time soaps (remember Betrayal? No? Me, neither). Which one is this?

Sadly, it is bad. A lot happens in the first hour of BLOOD & OIL, and it turns out to be too much. In an effort to keep the story rocketing along, the writers abandon even the slightest tinge of reality. A terrible car wreck? Yep, both occupants walk away unscathed. Need a large sum of money in a short amount of time? No problem, they’ll get it. Want to build a better life for yourself and your family? It only takes a week, but in this world, it could probably just as easily be gone in even less time. Half a dozen twists rocket past so fast you just might get whiplash. I don’t know how the production can possibly keep up this pace for twenty-two hours a year, as even in the pilot, it seems like they’re blowing through all the possibilities.

That just makes the show hard to get into. If you cannot relate to the people, or at least wish you were them, why would you watch? There isn’t a deep mystery, nor a bunch of secrets remaining hidden. It’s just betrayal and bad deeds, one after another, that cause harm to the other characters, and makes life harder. Then, a fantastical solution presents itself so that they can quickly move on to the next thing. The show itself has ADD.

BLOOD & OIL is basically an inferior Dallas. Inferior even to the recent TNT continuation of that show because of BLOOD & OIL’s all-over-the-place structure, with about an equal quality cast. As soon as you see the premise, you’ll see why Dallas is the first show that springs to mind to compare it to.

The cast is a solid B-tier. All of the actors are serviceable, but none stand out as excellent. They handle the scenes well, but without a lot of subtext. All of these performers could be well-used in certain parts, but not as the lead ensemble of a drama like this, and their combined average deliveries keep the show in the middle strata of quality.

Set in a North Dakota oil boom, we get a batch of moderately interesting players. Chace Crawford (Gossip Girl) is Billy LeFever, a brash young man with big dreams. Along with his high school sweetheart, and now wife, Cody (Rebecca Rittenhouse, Red Band Society), Billy borrows a lot of money from his family and friends and moves to a town he is sure he can strike it rich in. Once there, he meets tycoon Hap Briggs (Don Johnson, Dash Bridges), who ends up taking a shine to Billy. Hap has his own strong, loving partner, Carla (Amber Valetta, Revenge), and a screw-up son, Wick (Scott Michael Foster, Greek). These two families are the center of BLOOD & OIL, with a few townspeople sprinkled in every once in awhile.

What would make BLOOD & OIL worth your time? Perhaps a slower, more thoughtful arc in which the characters actually have to work for what comes to them. Maybe there could be some challenges we see them struggle to overcome. And perhaps some deep scenes which require more than a surface-level emotion could be added. None of this is evident in the first hour, and I’m not confident any of it will be incorporated into future installments, either.

BLOOD & OIL premieres Sunday, September 27^th at 9 p.m. ET on ABC.

ONCE UPON A TIME Suffers Huge "Fall" in Quality

Article first published as ONCE UPON A TIME Review Season 4 Episode 9 Fall on Seat42F.

In the antepenultimate episode of ABC’s ONCE UPON A TIME autumn run, “Fall,” the residents of Storybrooke race against time to find a way to stop the spell of shattered sight, knowing it will cause them to turn on one another. Anna (Elizabeth Lail) may be the key to that, but she’s still missing. Elsewhere, we witness what happens to Anna after she is unfrozen from the Snow Queen’s (Elizabeth Mitchell) spell.

The spell of shattered sight had got to be the slowest spell ever. Ever. It takes an entire day to hover over Storybrooke before covering it? It’s not like it’s slowly advancing across the town, as everyone becomes affected at once. How effective, exactly, is a spell that is seen long before it becomes relevant, giving its would-be victims ample time to plan a defense?

I also don’t understand why the Snow Queen’s spell on Arendelle melts when it does. Clearly, all of her ice doesn’t dissolve because her wall stays up and Marian stays frozen (or so we can assume). These Storybrooke ice sculptures exist at the same time as the Arendelle ones for at least awhile, so it’s not because the Snow Queen has moved realms or over-extended herself. What’s going on?

Please correct me in the comments if I’m wrong, but Anna has to have been frozen more than the thirty years that “Fall” claims, no? When she visits David in the Enchanted Forest, that’s only three decades before the present? That doesn’t seem to me to gel with the already established events in that realm shown over the past few seasons. The coincidences that follow, with Hans, (Tyler Jacob Moore), Blackbeard (Charles Mesure), and the trunk being pulled from the sea at the last moment are equally ridiculous.

Though the sisterly reunion is sweet, and I’m very glad that loveable Kristoff (Scott Michael Foster) gets to come to Storybrooke, too. There has been more than enough separation between loved ones. What’s up with that mysterious bottle that somehow tags along?

Worse than these weird plot elements, though, is the absolute and total ruination of Rumplestiltskin’s (Robert Carlyle) character. This has been a frequent topic of complaint for myself and other ONCE UPON A TIME fans recently, and “Fall” just piles on. Rumple makes a deal with the Snow Queen to leave the town and take Belle (Emilie de Ravin) and Henry (Jared S. Gilmore) with him. That she agrees isn’t surprising, since he is somehow immune from her spell and can cause trouble for her. But thinking Belle and Henry will stay with him after fleeing is a leap Rumple is smart enough never to make. He knows they have big hearts and care about others, so abandoning everyone else will surely make them turn against him.

Also, Rumple has never been shown to be power-hungry. He’s addicted to magic, sure, but mostly learned his lesson long ago, one that has been reiterated time and again. To abandon all of his growth and his hard-found knowledge with some generically evil scheme is far beneath this role, and one that the series should never have attempted to do with him.

Why does Belle, who won’t leave the diner with Rumple when he first shows up, suddenly agree to do so just before he locks her in the shop? A few words from him about not trusting fairies and she changes her mind? Not to mention, Belle is a hero, not a coward or submissive wife. It’s very frustrating.

I find it very odd that, as the spell finally does come down, Snow (Ginnifer Goodwin) and Charming (Josh Dallas) worry only about themselves, locking each other in jail cells. They are supposed to be leaders for the community, but do nothing other than send a messenger to tell people what’s happening. Shouldn’t they be making arrangements to help their people get through it, rather than leaving themselves helpless (and stupidly next to each other) and ignoring the townsfolk? Plus, giving Emma (Jennifer Morrison) the task of defeating the Snow Queen and taking care of her baby brother at the same time makes no sense.

I don’t believe Hook (Colin O’Donoghue) would betray everyone quite as severely as he does. Sure, he’s a pirate who wants to save his own skin, so working for Rumple is a conceivable bit, up to a point. But knowing he’s about to lose everything, Hook still doesn’t find the heroic side that the show had been cultivating in him? Dumb.

This episode isn’t without its moments. Regina (Lana Parrilla) and Robin Hood (Sean Maguire) have a touching scene that, while a bit repetitive, is moving. Watching the Blue Fairy (Keegan Connor Tracy) be taken down, surely temporarily, is dramatic. Emma has some emotional stuff that works for her.

However, this is overshadowed by all of the weaknesses in the hour. It’s true you could argue some of my points and we could agree to disagree on motivations. What there’s no denying is there are a TON of plot and character inconsistencies. When added together, this makes for a very disappointing and uneven episode, and the sheer number of them defies defense. I’ve mostly enjoyed the fall run, other than the decline in quality of Rumplestiltskin, but things are coming completely apart at the end and that’s not a good sign. ONCE UPON A TIME has almost always been uneven. “Fall” is some of the worst of that.

ONCE UPON A TIME airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.

ONCE UPON A TIME Needs a Long Look in the "Mirror"

Article first published as ONCE UPON A TIME Review Season 4 Episode 8/9 Smash the Mirror on Seat42F.

A lot happens in last night’s special two-hour ONCE UPON A TIME on ABC, “Smash the Mirror.” We see the rest of the Arendelle flashback story, bringing us up to the point in which the Snow Queen (Elizabeth Mitchell) comes over to our world. We witness the battle for Emma’s (Jennifer Morrison) soul, both internally and externally. And a former villain is given hope for a happy ending. Let’s get started.

First, despite the glaring flaws in this fall’s run, the Frozen tale has been nearly flawless. “Smash the Mirror” picks back up where last we left it, Anna (Elizabeth Lail) imprisoned by her aunt. Elsa (Georgina Haig) learns of this and quickly concocts a plan to stop the Snow Queen, refusing to believe ill of her sister. Their plan fails, unfortunately, with Elsa ending up in an urn, Anna and Kristoff (Scott Michael Foster) frozen (hehe) in the castle, and the Snow Queen messing with Elsa’s memory before The Apprentice (Timothy Webber) sends her to our world, circa 1982.

The story of the sisters, Elsa and Anna, is a strong one. Anna goes to other realms to save Elsa, and Elsa never stops believing in Anna, even when Anna is under a spell that makes her say horrible things. There is an argument to be made that Nasty Anna is buried deep inside the real Anna, an expression of the suffering she has endured. But an essential part of Anna is that she keeps hope and moves past such issues, always deciding to believe in Elsa. Seeing Elsa pay this back is extremely gratifying, and it’s this bond that the Snow Queen will never have.

There’s very much a there-but-for-you-go-I element in “Smash the Mirror.” Had the Snow Queen’s surviving sister stuck by her, no matter what bad things the Snow Queen accidentally did, her fate might have turned out very differently. The Snow Queen desperately wants what Elsa and Anna already have. Knowing they won’t accept her as one of them, she goes to extremes to force such a relationship. What she will have to end up realizing, but hasn’t yet, is such bonds cannot be forced. They have to be given freely.

ONCE UPON A TIME does make the plot quite cohesive, providing a believable way the Snow Queen comes to our land, sets the stage for her memory spells, and provides a possible motivation as to why she does what she goes. Once the Snow Queen knows she can make people forget and start with a clean slate again, it would be tempting to do so anytime things go bad. That’s surely what happened with Emma, though we haven’t seen that yet.

The Snow Queen is a formidable foe. She goes toe-to-toe with Rumple (Robert Carlyle) this week and wins. While she herself is not the instrument of victory, she does manages to link Emma and Elsa to herself, which is the next stage in her plan, and goes against Rumple’s desires. It will be interesting to see how she can be defeated because, despite knowing she must fail, she is in a pretty good position at the episode’s end.

Emma is still a bit out-of-character in “Smash the Mirror.” After making Henry (Jared S. Gilmore) very slightly bleed, she goes into a panic, and eagerly accepts Rumple’s offer to remove her powers. It takes her forever to get to his cabin, and the others have plenty of time to track her, which doesn’t seem right, but from an emotional standpoint, these hours do a better job of illustrating the turmoil in Emma’s heart than others have. She wants to rid herself of power because she’s afraid of it, but Elsa, who has personal understanding, gets through to Emma and helps her accept herself.

It’s a little strange how easily Emma has things under control at the end of the episode, a new stage for ONCE UPON A TIME. Yet, perhaps it’s a timing thing. Finally able to see who she is and live up to her potential, she gets a handle on the powers. Even if the path to get there is a little bumpy, there are some strong character moments for Emma, and her fireworks scene is an earned triumph.

More uneven than Emma is Rumple’s plot, though. This Rumple takes Hook’s (Colin O’Donoghue) heart and seeks to destroy Emma so he can have power and take over the world. This is absolutely ridiculous. Rumple has never been shown to have these ambitions, and in fact works directly against such things in past seasons. The Rumple in “Smash the Mirror” is a completely new character than before, and not in a good way. ONCE’s biggest glaring mistake this year is to toss out Rumple’s entire arc and start fresh with an unrecognizable antagonist. It makes me ill to see how he has been handled.

Hook, to a lesser extent, is in a similar boat. His actions, from betraying Emma, to confessing to her, have bene erratic and nonsensical. I get the urge to be a hero and worthy of Emma, but then it’s more confusing when Hook acts against those interests. He has been used poorly as of late, too.

On a polar opposite, Regina’s ONCE UPON A TIME arc has been stellar. This week, she gets assurances from Robin Hood (Sean Maguire) that she’ll have a happy ending, ponders the path not taken, has a touching moment with her son, and is given encouragement by Snow White (Ginnifer Goodwin), of all people, who admits her own bratty past. I was worried for a bit the show would let Regina slip, negating her growth, but the other characters have rallied around her, even those who one doesn’t expect to, and in their eyes, Regina finally sees her best self reflected.

What’s more, Robin’s discovery in the library, with the help of Will Scarlet (Michael Socha), gives Regina hope. Robin finds an alternate page to Henry’s storybook, one in which Regina is not a villain. This proves the book isn’t set in stone so Regina can still change her ending! Yay!

Which begs the question, are new pages being added to the book? If so, why hasn’t anyone mentioned it? And because the page just appears in Robin’s bag, does that mean the author is still around? Possibly hiding in the magic library? Maleficent is still in the basement, isn’t she? And where is the Sorcerer’s Apprentice, who can see past and future, these days? Anyone else get the feeling the Apprentice might actually be the Sorcerer? Hmm.

For everyone awesome ONCE UPON A TIME moment, and there are many in “Smash the Mirror,” there is an unfortunate one, sometimes small, but always present. When looking at the TV schedule from last night, ONCE is only about the sixth or seventh best show on Sunday nights (behind The Walking Dead, The Newsroom, The Good Wife, and arguably several others) right now. There are a heck of a lot more than six shows on Sundays, but that’s still not a position to really brag about. If only it would get its act together, like it did a year ago, it could rise to match or exceed some of its currently-better peers. The potential is high, but the series just doesn’t live up to it as much as it should, making its wins, such as last night’s episode, bittersweet.

ONCE UPON A TIME airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.

ONCE UPON A TIME, There Were "Two (Frozen) Sisters"

Article first published as ONCE UPON A TIME Review Season 4 Episode 1 A Tale of Two Sisters on Seat42F.

WARNING: There are spoilers below, but as always for unaired episodes, I don’t give away anything too major.

ABC’s ONCE UPON A TIME is back this weekend, kicking off a whole new arc related to the recent blockbuster movie Frozen, beginning with the episode “A Tale of Two Sisters.” While last spring’s Oz arc didn’t live up to expectations, the previous fall’s Neverland run was nothing short of spectacular. We’re only one episode in to the new story, but as far as first impressions go, this is a solid one, favoring the latter’s quality, rather than the former’s.

As some fans have been eagerly anticipating, “A Tale of Two Sisters” brings Elsa (Georgina Haig, Fringe) and her sibling, Anna (newcomer Elizabeth Lail), into ONCE UPON A TIME. And there is no shortage of the girls in the premiere. We see them in multiple time periods and get Elsa in both their home and in Storybrooke. Whatever this immediate plot entails, it will have plenty of them.

The main portion of Elsa and Anna’s scenes are set in their kingdom after the end of the movie. So if you haven’t seen Frozen, you may want to check it out this beforehand to catch you up on who these people are. ONCE UPON A TIME may eventually reveal enough to follow along without prior knowledge, but the scenes with Elsa, Anna, Kristoff (Scott Michael Foster, Greek), Sven (played by an actual reindeer, hilariously used!), and Pabbie the Troll (CGI, voiced by John Rhys Davies from The Lord of the Rings) may seem confusing to those who don’t already know them.

By beginning after the movie (spoiler for those who haven’t seen Frozen!), Elsa isn’t a villain the way she is for much of the film. She isn’t completely good either, though, as she is still struggling to control her powers. Suddenly dropped into a strange land, and likely on a very important mission viewers can guess at, it makes sense for her to panic and perhaps get a bit defensive. I’m not quite sure yet how she’ll fold in (or not) with the Storybrooke residents, but there is definitely the potential for conflict here, and I will say the earliest, indirect encounters don’t exactly go smoothly.

Some have criticized ONCE UPON A TIME in the past for periodically giving too much screen time to guest stars and not developing the core cast enough. While “A Tale of Two Sisters” definitely has a lot of Frozen fare, it does provide good, character-driven scenes to many of the primary players, too, striking what I feel is a respectable balance between the two camps.

Obviously, the biggest question after last spring’s finale is if Regina (Lana Parrilla) will slip back into her evil ways. This question is addressed a lot in the hour, but not answered this week. She is definitely tempted to smite Marian (Christie Laing), who is long believed dead until she suddenly shows back up to claim her husband, Regina’s boyfriend, Robin Hood (Sean Maguire). She even recruits an old henchman (yay!) to help her out. But Regina is no longer just the Evil Queen, and slipping back to her old ways doesn’t come as naturally as it once did. She also has a perhaps-unexpected ally trying to save her. Parrilla gives an as-usual fantastic performance as Regina struggles with her warring motivations.

Those who prefer the romantic side of things should be happy with “A Tale of Two Sisters.” There is some great stuff between Emma (Jennifer Morrison) and Hook (Colin O’Donoghue), and some even better stuff between Rumple (Robert Carlyle) and Belle (Emilie de Ravin). The latter’s honeymoon becomes quite fairy tale-esque in a scene that will make many Beauty and the Beast fans smile.

Both Rumple and Regina also kick off some extremely interesting arcs, one relating to another familiar tale not yet covered in ONCE UPON A TIME, and the other diving deeper into the base mythology of the show, exploring something not dwelled upon for some time. These are promising, excellent threads that should hopefully pair nicely with the Frozen line, succeeding in keeping everyone important busy in the coming season.

As for the announced new main cast member, the Knave of Hearts (Michael Socha) from the spin-off Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, he’s completely MIA in the first episode back. But his name graces the opening credits, so I expect that won’t be the case for long, and there’s still time to hold out hope that he won’t be coming to Storybrooke alone.

In all, ONCE UPON A TIME has a great return to form, beginning a fascinating series of stories and doing justice to the best characters in the show, even while introducing yet another batch of new ones. It’s too early to tell if this fall will rival the show’s Neverland zenith, but it’s got the right ingredients in place to serve the show well, should they be mixed correctly and baked for the right amount of time.

ONCE UPON A TIME airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.

Zero Hour holds zero interest

Article first published as ZERO HOUR Series Premiere on Seat42F.

Grade: 71%

This week, ABC will present broadcast television’s latest attempt at a cool genre show in ZERO HOUR. The team who run Modern Skeptic Magazine are thrown into disarray when the editor’s wife is kidnapped. As they search for her, they realize that the plot is much bigger than expected, and that the end of the world is nigh.

ZERO HOUR is a little like The DaVinci Code, but less complex. It begins with a mystery couched in Germany decades ago, which extends into the present day. There is a secret society willing to murder to protect a secret, and whom surely have an agenda to influence world events. The heroes are hopelessly noble and in over their heads, but will surely find a way to triumph in the end, against all odds.

That all sounds like it could work, but I am not super impressed by the first hour. I think the main problem is the lack of a protagonist to get behind. Hank (Anthony Edwards, ER), the editor, is sort of interesting, but he doesn’t immediately draw you in as someone to get behind. I don’t know if it’s because he’s not really relatable, or because he’s a mellow dude without the simmering complexity below the surface of the now-common TV anti-hero, but he just doesn’t provide that hook viewers look for.

Hank is supported by a pair of copy editors, Rachel Lewis (Addison Timlin, Californication) and Arron Martin (Scott Michael Foster, Greek, The River), both personally and professionally. These two lack any distinguishing personality traits in the premiere. They are loyal, sure, but also break the rules, disobeying Hank when they think they can help him another way. But that is exactly the same as every supporting character in a similar capacity in any story like this. So there isn’t anything that stands out about them.

Hank’s wife, Laila (Jacinda Barrett, Suits, Poseidon), meanwhile, is only glimpsed. She’s a beautiful, intelligent woman with an interest in fixing antique clocks and a doting husband. That’s all we know about her, and it makes it a little hard to care too much when she is taken.

The federal agent assigned to Laila’s disappearance is Rebecca Riley (Carmen Ejogo, Chaos, Kidnapped). She knows more than she lets on, having been involved in the investigation of the shady, sinister group for quite some time. But she reveals none of herself to Hank or the viewer in this pilot. She also deeply underestimates the enemy, but I guess if she were good enough to catch the bad guys, she would have done it already during her previous years working the case. so my guess is ZERO HOUR will find Hank being the primary investigator, with Rebecca serving as backup.

Rounding out the cast is White Vincent (Michael Nyqvist, the Swedish version of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo’s Mikael Blomkvist). White Vincent is the mysterious face of the group who is causing the trouble, but again, there isn’t much there to help flesh out his role in the series. We see that he is able to get around Rebecca and Hank’s efforts fairly easily, but there isn’t anything shown that tells us what kind of guy he is.

Basically, my problem with ZERO HOUR is that it is way too bland. None of the characters come fully developed and shaped, and nothing major happens. Sure, there’s a death or two in the first episode, but these are people we’ve just met, and don’t know anything about, so they don’t mean anything. Running around and not accomplishing anything is only enticing if we get to see the pathos the people involved are going through, and get to understand them. In ZERO HOUR, that second layer is absent, which makes the action feel hollow.

I admit the opening is pretty cool, where the priests pull something hidden from the water, and then are slaughtered. But a historic-set beginning that doesn’t translate in an obvious way to the main modern day story is kind of useless. There isn’t a big connecting thread yet.

At the end of the pilot, Hank and Rebecca find a Nazi submarine trapped in the ice. We don’t know how it got there, or what it means, but it’s supposed to be a big question that will drive the story and entice viewers to tune in for a second week. I’m sorry, but it’s too little, too late, and isn’t handled with enough mystique for me to care.

What ZERO HOUR should have done is spread the presented pilot into a two hour drama. That way, it could have taken the time to introduce us to Hank and the others, show us what makes them tick, and begin to build a bond between the viewer and the characters. Lacking this investment, I don’t see large numbers returning on a weekly basis.

The other thing that bothers me is how the Modern Skeptic Magazine is presented. With a title like that, one would assume it is being run by conspiracy nuts. And we get just a small taste of that sort of personality from Arron. But Hank is a level-headed, reasonable guy. How can he get behind a publication like this, and deliver what likely subscribers would want? He doesn’t seem the type.

ZERO HOUR premieres Thursday, February 14th at 8 p.m. I doubt it will run more than thirteen episodes (at the most), not being nearly as clever as ABC’s flop last spring, The River, so if you want to check it out, do it quickly.

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Californication goes to Hell and back

Showtime's Californication ends its fifth season with "Hell Ain't a Bad Place to Be." Hank (David Duchovny) envisions himself in Hell, which is a bar where his deceased pal, Lew Ashby (Callum Keith Rennie), is the bartender. Waking up, Hank spends his day fixing everyone's problems, as, for once, he is the one who has his life together. And by helping others, Hank begins to be right with them, these people he is preparing to leave in the previous episode. Unfortunately, before Hank can get to his happy ending with Karen (Natascha McElhone), Carrie (Natalie Zea) shows up and drugs him.

Why is Lew the bartender in Hank's vision of Hell? Does Hank really think he's destined to go to the place below, considering how good he's been lately? Or does Hank still see himself as that bad boy that hangs out with Lew, a time in his life where Hank is near rock bottom? It's an interesting and cryptic look inside of Hank's head.

Luckily, Hank's life is not so chaotic anymore. He is back together with Karen, the love of his life, now that she is splitting from her husband, Bates (Jason Beghe), who gives his blessing to the reunion. Hank's daughter, Becca (Madeleine Martin), no longer hates him. What's more, Hank might have even gotten through to Tyler (Scott Michael Foster), Becca's loser fiancé. And Charlie (Evan Handler), Hank's best friend, who is on the outs with Hank, takes a bullet for him. So it looks like life can't get any better for wayward protagonist.

The thing is, how will Carrie screw this up for him? For once, any trouble Hank is in is not his fault. Sure, one can argue that Hank shouldn't have hooked up with Carrie in the first place. But Hank has done more than enough to make up for that mistake. Any actions that Carrie takes now are her own fault, not to be blamed on Hank.

Will Karen forgive Hank for a drugged indiscretion with Carrie? It truly will not be Hank's decision to do anything. In fact, Hank sees Heaven in that moment, and his Heaven includes Karen. Surely Karen will understand this and view Hank as a victim. Right?

Things look good for Charlie in the end, too. His son is talking, and considering who the parents are, "blow job" is an acceptable first word. Marcy (Pamela Adlon) is leaving Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky), and is by Charlie's side at the end of "Hell Ain't a Bad Place to Be." So hopefully Hank and Karen won't be the only reunited couple.

Season five of Californication is depressing because things are so screwed up for all of the characters through most of the episodes, instead of just for Hank, the usual formula. In fact, Hank has his best year yet, in terms of staying on the right path. But with a sixth season ordered, and the finale ending in a bright place (save the Carrie drama), could next year finally bring a happy ending? Can't wait to find out!

Californication airs on Showtime.

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At The River's end

ABC's The River brings its eight episode freshman run to a close this week. The series follows Tess Cole (Leslie Hope, The Mentalist, 24) and her adult son, Lincoln (Joe Anderson, Across the Universe), as they set off into the Amazon, trailed by a camera crew and old friends, to find Tess's missing husband, TV personality Dr. Emmet Cole (Bruce Greenwood, Star Trek, John from Cincinnati, Knots Landing). But the jungle is haunted by a dark spirit, and they path they follow is an arduous one.

Seven episodes in, they find Emmet Cole, alive and well. So the eighth episode, "Row, Row, Row Your Boat," is just the characters sailing happily home, right? Of course not. The demon of the river is not ready to let them go just yet. It gains entrance onto the boat when jilted cameraman Jonas (Scott Michael Foster, Greek, Californication) shoots at Emmet, but kills Lincoln instead. Grief stricken, Tess asks Jahel (Paulina Gaitan, Trade) to bring Lincoln back, but the evil one comes with Lincoln, possessing his body. 

The River hits many of the right notes for a horror series, cycling through a lot of different tropes of the genre. There is a supernatural element, of course. Mixed in are some generic spooky scenes, exorcism rituals, and slasher bits. There's also a little bit of mystery and mythology included for good measure. Because this is network TV, there isn't a ton of sex, something many horror films use, but there is plenty of blood and violence.

The River is not as good as FX's American Horror Story. The performers aren't as talented, the plot has holes from time to time, and certain situations seem set up just to build suspense, rather than further the story. But it's a decent series for network television, and, if allowed time to grow, could become something great. There isn't a lot of the horror category currently on broadcast television, so any attempt has to be given some credit, and this one is a serviceable effort.

There are also some similarities between The River and Lost. Again, The River is a far inferior series, so they should not be held up together, as that doesn't do this new show any favors. But some of the mystery and back story, as well as flashbacks and tone, contribute to the comparison. Not to mention both shows share a network.

As The River brings season one to a close, the crew is almost home free, demon banished, but then, in a very Lost-like moment, the streams begin to rearrange themselves. Had this not happened, the eight-episode run would serve as a relatively complete, enjoyable mini-series. Since the creative team choose such a cliffhanger, the show is begging to be brought back next year. There are plenty more stories to be told about these characters, so why not give them another chance?

The River deserves another season. While not a work of genius, it's pretty exciting, and original enough to merit more installments. Should it be renewed, The River will return to ABC next year.

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Californication takes "JFK to LAX"

     Roughly three years have passed in the world of Showtime's Californication as the series returns for a fifth season with "JFK to LAX." Hank (David Duchovny) breaks up with his girlfriend of a year, Carrie (Natalie Zea, Justified) when she wants to get serious. Then he flees on a plane to LA, meeting a charming young lady named Kali (Meagan Good) along the way. What Hank doesn't realize until later is that Kali is already spoken for by the rapper Samurai Apocalypse (RZA, Blade: Trinity) who'd like to hire Hank to write a movie.

     Isn't this always the way of Californication? Hank doesn't intend to get into trouble, but it just happens. And he doesn't set out to hook up with non-single girls, but they are attracted to him like teen girls to cell phones. Or to Hank, for that matter. Thirty minutes into the new season, with everyone else starting fresh, Hank is right back as he started, in the same types of situations, which will surely end badly, as they always do.

     It's a good thing others have moved on in "JFK to LAX." Charlie Runkle (Evan Handler) seems at peace with ex-wife Marcy (Pamela Adlon), who is experiencing a sexual renaissance with Stu Baggs (Stephen Tobolowsky). It might help that she gave Charlie a son, Stuart (Quin and Reed Baron), though at two and a half, the son isn't talking yet. It also might help that Charlie finally brings is 100th girl! Both Charlie and Marcy have no shame in flaunting their sexual activities in front of Hank, a sign that they are in a good place.

     Karen (Natascha McElhone), too, has moved on, remarried and living happily with Richard (Jason Beghe). Hank seems happy enough for them, considering he likes how Richard treats Hank's daughter, Becca (Madeleine Martin), though Karen being married hasn't stopped Hank in the past from going after her. The difference here, though, from season one is that Karen doesn't appear to want Hank to continue to pursue her. So she has moved on without Hank, and that is, indeed, a big shake up in the ways of Californication.

     Speaking of Becca, she is on a path one might never think to see her on in "JFK to LAX:" she is dating an older boy named Tyler (Scott Michael Foster, Greek) who is just like her father. Shouldn't Becca have learned her lesson after watching all of the bad things that happen to Hank? True, girls to often idolize their dads, and look for someone like them. But in this case, it's a shame that Becca falls into that trap. Hank is essentially a good man, but he is wrong for any girl. And because viewers aren't familiar with and charmed by Tyler, this outsider view does not look good for poor Becca.

     In short, the hook of season five will be how does Hank cope with everyone he loves having moved on and found their happiness? Where does he go when he is no longer surrounded by tortured souls? Considering he spends the past three years in New York, away from these people, perhaps it's his fault that they were in bad places originally, and without him, they are better off. Except for Becca. Hank really must find a way to give his daughter a wake up call.

     Watch Californication Sundays at 10:30 p.m. ET on Showtime.

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